BDSM Life Style

Finding a New Love – The Impact of Time on Your BDSM Checklist

Falling in love is easy, so is falling out of love-especially when it is the love of a toy.  One of the assignments that I assign to the people I mentor involves this occurrence.   When I came into the lifestyle, I had two main loves-rope and floggers.  To me, there was nothing better than getting to play with one or both of these items.  Floggers were always a favorite because the rhythmic heavy thud was like a massage to me.  It was wonderful.  I loved it so much that I was the first living, breathing, responsive bottom for more than one person who was ready to flog someone, not something.   Rope had the same love for me.  It was like a puzzle and there were a lot of times that I would stealthily slip out of the ties only to realize that I had gone too far and suddenly needed to hide the fact that I was actually unbound.

That was almost five years ago.  And a lot can change in five years.

As my comfort level grew, so did my desire to experience new things.  I tried things that I had never expected to even attempt, much less enjoy.  I took rope bondage to a new level and tried suspensions.  And, despite a less than stellar first flight, I tried it again less than a year later, with a much more experienced top and soared in a way that could have easily lulled me to sleep.  To enhance flogging, I tried fire flogging with a very well respected top whose knowledge of fire is pretty deep.  In doing so, I found a different version of flogging that was oddly relaxing and exhilarating at the same time.  I did not replace my loves, they just evolved a little bit.  They grew as I was growing.

There is a pretty extensive list of things that I have tried that easily became my new favorite “loves.”  And all of them are things that I would have marked as a “no” on my initial BDSM checklist over.  Compare it to where you were when you came into the lifestyle.  Then do it again in a year.  I bet that you have more than a few changes yourself.

Author Since: Jul 26, 2018

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