BDSM Life Style

How The 50 Shades of Grey Series and Movie Have Impacted the BDSM Lifestyle

from the Submissive Guide Newsletter 2/21/15

I had, for the longest time, an opinion that I was not going to write about or mention the “50 Shades of Grey” series on this site. I’ve never read them and have no desire to see the movie, but I have read countless reviews and read-alongs from others in the community and the media to make up my mind about some of what I knew would be prevalent within the literature and newly released movie. Just days after the movie released, this site received a spike in views that more than doubled what it averaged on any other given day – that alone brought my voice to the front and I knew I wanted to give some of my viewpoints on how this piece of popular culture has impacted the the books from Amazon:

When literature student Anastasia Steele goes to interview young entrepreneur Christian Grey, she encounters a man who is beautiful, brilliant, and intimidating. The unworldly, innocent Ana is startled to realize she wants this man and, despite his enigmatic reserve, finds she is desperate to get close to him. Unable to resist Ana’s quiet beauty, wit, and independent spirit, Grey admits he wants her, too—but on his own terms.

Shocked yet thrilled by Grey’s singular erotic tastes, Ana hesitates. For all the trappings of success—his multinational businesses, his vast wealth, his loving family—Grey is a man tormented by demons and consumed by the need to control. When the couple embarks on a daring, passionately physical affair, Ana discovers Christian Grey’s secrets and explores her own dark desires.

On that premise, it is a trashy romance. And most people in the BDSM is unrealistic, plenty of abuse and rape and a very messed up relationship at the basis of it. So, why are people transfixed by it and using it as a new sex manual in their relationships and marriages?

It’s Everywhere

When a book goes from a water cooler gossip book to a worldwide phenomenon it’s hard to go anywhere without people talking about it. While I know many BDSM and some of it is positive. The fact that they are talking about it at all helps to build people’s opinions about alternate sex practices. I have always felt that having an opinion based on information is better than not knowing anything at all about a subject.

It’s Unrealistic

The inaccurate portrayal of the BDSM itself isn’t realistic to what could actually happen. So the fantasy is even further extended to the actual BDSM participants have is that the vanilla public will begin to believe that this is the way it always is and shun the alternate sexuality even more and then vilify or criminalize safer differences between BDSM and thankfully they’ve approached the community to get that instruction. I know that I’ve seen a jump up to twice the amount of normal visitors on Submissive Guide for each release of the books and when the movie came out. It’s good that people are exploring what might be a longing they’ve had for quite a while.

Now, with that, it also brings curious people that aren’t interested, but just want to gawk at the perverts, media reports of local communities and the damage it can deal with smaller, less organized groups. So, community leaders have to be more aware and on the ball with the new people coming in. I’m certain that in time, these uninterested people will just fade back into their own lives and leave us be, but until them, I’m sure we’ll see even more news reports of debacles at BDSM community and I would like to hear from you in the comments or send me an email. What impact do you see? Is it good or bad for the community?

Thoughts to Ponder

  1. What do you think of the media coverage that “50 Shades of Gray” is getting?
  2. What other impacts does the book/movie have in the Whip Smart: Real-Life Dominatrix Takes on ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’
  3. Real Members of the ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ Criticized for Inaccurate Portrayal of

Author Since: Jul 26, 2018

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