This Is Why It’s A Good Idea To Unfriend Your S.O. On Facebook

Okay. So this might seem like a totally outlandish and stupid idea when you first hear it. And no one can blame you for thinking that way. If you were to go on Facebook today and discover that your significant other has unfriended you, you would probably go ballistic. You would get very upset and you’d probably throw a tantrum. Why would the person who supposedly means more to you than anyone else in life want to keep you off their Facebook feeds? Why would they want to deprive themselves of your amazing posts, your clever comments, and pretty pictures?

You would feel completely betrayed and rejected to know that your partner wouldn’t want to see the stuff that you share on your social media pages. Your partner should be your biggest fan and your most loyal audience, right? So why would it be a good idea for you to unfriend one another on Facebook to save your relationship? You would absolutely hate the feeling of being unfriended by ANYONE on Facebook – much less the person you happen to be in a relationship with. You wouldn’t be able to understand that scenario if it ever took place. However,

you must already be exposed to the idea of people deleting their social media accounts just to disconnect themselves from the world for a bit. And as it turns out, there are many good reasons why you should consider deleting your special partner from you social media pages as well. In a relationship, it’s always important to maintain openness and honesty with one another. However, there is always going to be room for a little mystery – especially when the relationship is still new and fresh; when you’re only just getting to know one another. Remember that a relationship is a process of self-discovery and learning.

You always want to be discovering more and more about who you are in this relationship; and who your partner is as well. And if you’re practically sharing every single aspect of your life on social media, then a lot of the mystery just vanishes completely. You have nothing left to really talk about when you’re together. There is nothing more to discover. There is no more mystery to unravel. The allure loses its luster. You don’t get excited at the thought of learning more about your partner anymore. Plenty of relationship and sexuality experts have already concluded that love isn’t necessarily measured by how much you know about your partner.

In fact, the opposite is almost always true. It’s all about the passion, curiosity, and intensity that couples express in getting to know each other more. It’s about the expression of interest that keeps the flame of passion alive in a relationship. Couples who never feel content with what they know about one another; the ones who are always learning more and more about each other as each day passes – they are the ones who have really strong bonds and relationships.

If you are just too active on your social media pages, you are practically opening your whole life up for the entire world to pay witness to. And it’s not even just about the most interesting and fascinating aspects of your life anymore; it’s not about your greatest accomplishments or your grandest adventures. People are exposed to even the most simplistic and mundane aspects of your life and personality – your meal tendencies, your fashion sense, your musical tastes, and other such seemingly trivial things. But these things are far from being trivial especially when it comes to romantic relationships.

These are nuances to your personality that your significant other will want to obsess over – and if you’re broadcasting all of these things on social media, you are depriving your partner of the opportunity to know these things about you in a very natural and organic manner. Take note that a lot of couples also fall into traps of routine and predictability. They assume that stability in a relationship is good because it means that there is consistency and order. And while that may be true for the most part, too much stability and predictability can be very bad for romance. It can make things seem very mundane, repetitive, and boring.

And you would never want your relationship to be a boring one; and that’s exactly why it’s always good if you are able to maintain a sense of mystery in your relationship. The less your partner knows about you, the less predictable you are – and therefore, the more exciting your relationship is going to be. There is always something so liberating about being able to make a discovery concerning the person you love most in this world. It’s as if you’re incentivizing your partner to stay with you; to really take the time and effort to get to know you more.

5 Dangerous Signs You’re In A Relationship With A Narcissist

There is a very fine line between being confident and narcissistic. For the untrained eye, the confident guy and the narcissistic guy can look exactly the same – even when that’s far from being the case. When you’re just starting to get to know a guy, it might be really hard for you to tell if he’s just being self-assured of he’s being plainly narcissistic – and that’s vital. You always need to make sure that you aren’t dating a real narcissist. If you do, things are never going to work out. Narcissists are virtually incapable of sustaining healthy relationships because of their inability to get intimate and be selfless.

If you really are dating a narcissist, then you are in for a real emotional rollercoaster – and it’s not going to look pretty at all. Yes, confidence can be very attractive in a guy. It’s so much easier to fall in love with someone who exudes a certain sense of confidence. It also makes you more confident to be with him as well. But again, it’s very important that you are able to make that delineation between a confident person and a narcissist. The truth is that we all live in a very self-obsessed world these days. In this age of social media, it’s so easy for narcissists to find a platform to put themselves on full display.

But is a man who is active on social media really a narcissist? Well, not necessarily. And the ambiguity of it all can make it really hard for you to pass accurate judgment. However, as has already been mentioned, it’s really important for you to be able to spot the difference – for your own sake. You wouldn’t want to have to put yourself through the unfortunate experience of being in a relationship with a self-obsessed narcissist. And that’s really not easy. A lot of times, narcissism can just look like self-assuredness and confidence. And these aren’t necessarily bad things, right?

It’s always nice that you are able to attach yourself to a man who has no self-esteem issues. But there are some very subtle ways in which you will be able to tell the difference between a narcissist and a confident person. It’s all in the nuances of his behavior and his demeanor. A confident person is going to be able to put faith in themselves to succeed. But a narcissist is always going to put themselves on level that is higher in relation with other people. It’s not intrinsic. It’s all dependent on how they see themselves in comparison to others.

Does that make sense to you? If not, then that’s okay. That’s too simplistic of an explanation. Just read on until the end of this article so that you can get a better idea of what a narcissistic man really looks like. And once you spot these red flags in any guy that you’re dating, then it’s best for you to jump ship right away. Narcissistic men are master manipulators, and if you let yourself be vulnerable with one, then he is going to prey on you with reckless abandon.

1. He talks about himself all of the time.

It’s as is he’s virtually incapable of having any kind of conversation that doesn’t revolve around him. His favorite topic is himself. He manages to bring all topics of conversation back to him. He will find a way to inject himself into any kind of discussion. Unless the talks revolve around him, he’s not going to be interested at all.

2. Your opinions are irrelevant to him unless they perfectly jive with his own.

He thinks that he’s always right. He believes himself to be someone who is incapable of doing any wrong in this life. And if you contradict him, he’s going to think that you’re wrong and he isn’t going to even pay you any mind. He’s just going to automatically dismiss whatever misgivings that you might have.

3. He places his own personal needs above yours ALL OF THE TIME.

He never asks you what he can do for you. He never asks you about what he can do to make the relationship better. All he is ever really concerned about is what you can do to serve him and meet his needs. He’s only ever really concerned about his own expectations being met.

4. He only ever acts kind towards you when he wants you to do something for him.

You know that there is always some ulterior motive with him. He only ever acts kind and nice towards you when he needs something. Otherwise, he just keeps to himself and he does his own thing without caring for you.

5. He loves it when other people are more miserable than him.

He takes great joy in sharing misery with others. It’s not enough that he is ahead – he wants other people to really suffer and get left behind.

7 Pieces Of Terrible Relationship Advice That You Should Never Follow

We are all in need of some good advice every once in a while. That’s why it’s always important that we surround ourselves with people who are smart and insightful; people who are able to offer us fresh perspectives on the world.

These are people who are able to give us important learning points that we can use to lead better lives. Conversely, it’s important that we tune out people who just give us bad advice. We never want to be misled into making bad decisions that could be detrimental to the way that we live.

But how do you know if a person’s piece of advice is going to be good or bad? Well, a lot of the time, you can’t really be sure until you experience it for yourself. And that’s unfortunate if you end up following a bad piece of advice that ends up blowing up right in your face. But hey, that’s life. You live and you learn. You rise and you fall. You make your mistakes and you do your best to grow from them.

But sometimes, it pays to get things right the first time – especially when it comes to love. You don’t want to follow terrible relationship advice because it could potentially cost you a shot at having a happy life with the person who you love the most in this world.

You don’t want to end up losing a perfectly healthy relationship just because you’ve been given terrible advice by an unreliable source. And when it comes to relationships, there are so many terrible pieces of advice out there and you really have to make sure that you’re careful before you decide to follow them.

But to help put your mind at ease, this article is going to highlight a few popular pieces of advice that you should never follow under any circumstance. Don’t risk it. You don’t want o be the cause of your relationship’s failure. So just learn to say no to terrible advice and save yourself the trouble.

1. “You should always choose to be with the person who can give you more.”

Sometimes, it’s good to assess your relationship by how much you’re getting out of it. But it should never be the sole basis or motivation for you to stay in your relationship. You shouldn’t be choosing to be with a person based solely on how much value that person adds to your life. You can’t have such a selfish philosophy going into your relationships.

2. “Never let your partner boss you around like an employee.”

You shouldn’t really be looking at it like that. Yes, you shouldn’t be allowing yourself to be a doormat. But you shouldn’t be so offended if your partner has certain expectations and standards as well. You just need to communicate your needs to one another and make sure that you’re always on the same page so that no one’s feelings get hurt.

3. “You have the right to demand your partner to be like those people you see in romantic movies.”

Be realistic. You can’t expect your partner to be romantic if it’s just not their personality. You can’t expect your partner to cultivate a fairytale-like atmosphere in your relationship if your love just isn’t built like that. Stop focusing on what you see in the movies and start looking more into

4. “Just shut up and avoid conflict as much as possible.”

Never shy away from conflict. Don’t eat your feelings away. Speak up whenever you feel the need to. It’s important that you understand the importance of getting through conflicts and disagreements in a mature and healthy manner. It’s a lot better than keeping your feelings bottled up inside until you implode.

5. “Go ahead and snoop through their private messages. It’s your right in the relationship.”

You never have the right to violate anyone’s privacy – especially your partner’s. Just because you are in a relationship together doesn’t mean that you just get to do whatever you want. You still need to have boundaries. You still have to be able to trust and respect one another as mature adults. Don’t betray the trust that your partner is giving you.

6. “You have to demand that they bring home a certain amount of money if you’re going to stay together.”

While money is an important factor in relationships, it should never be the prime driver of your romance. You can’t put ultimatums like that in the hands of your partner. You can’t be so materialistic and shallow to think that money is what is going to make or break your relationship.

7. “You should try to make your relationship more like our relationship.”

This is probably the worst piece of advice on this list. You should never feel pressured to make your relationship like another relationship. You should never have to judge your relationship based on how another relationship conducts itself. You are in a unique relationship that only you get to judge and work on.

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Don’t Force Me To Change, Just Love Me. Love Is What Changes Me.

If you love me, don’t change me.

People change. But that shouldn’t mean that you get the right to change me – especially if you claim that you love me. But I understand it. I know where you are coming from. For the longest time, I also thought that it was okay to try and change the people we love – especially when we do it with the best of intentions. I thought that it was normal for two people in a loving relationship to try and change one another. But little did I know that that was the reason my relationships ended up failing and falling apart. And I don’t want that to happen for us. I won’t try to change you. And I sincerely hope that you won’t try to change me. At the end of the day, we should love one another – and perhaps that love can inspire a change in us that’s for the better.

I don’t want to fall into the trap of falling in love with someone but only in a partial sense. I used to be like that. I used to fall head over heels for a person. But then I wouldn’t be so tolerant of some very specific aspects of that person’s character. And instead of loving those parts, I tried to change them. I made my partners feel like I really couldn’t love them wholeheartedly unless they changed for me. And I know now that I was wrong. Sure, no one is perfect. No one is without their flaws. But that doesn’t mean that anyone has the right to compel a person to change especially when they are in a loving relationship together.

One of the greatest lessons that I’ve picked up in all of my heartbreaks is this: when a person is allowing themselves to be vulnerable by revealing who they really are on the inside to you, then that person is taking a risk with you. And when you tell that person that you don’t like what you see, then you crush them. You crush their soul. When a person bares their soul to you, and you genuinely believe that you love this person, you tell that person that you love them – with flaws, blemishes, and imperfections included. Because at the end of the day, people can still change. But once a trust is broken, it will never be the same.

If I tell you that I’m not ready for a marriage just yet even though you really want to get hitched already, I hope that you can still love me. Because it’s not that I’m never going to change. It’s just that I can’t change at the pace that you want me to. And I need you to accept that about me. And it’s really supposed to be like that with other aspects of our relationship as well. Just because I’m not a certain way at the moment doesn’t mean that I’m never going to be the way that you want me to be. Sometimes, things just take time.

We all move out our own individual paces. And I can’t have you rushing me if it’s not meant for me. I need you to love me. I need to feel the security that comes with you loving me regardless if I change for the better or not. We don’t always have to see eye to eye on everything. You don’t always have to sway me into believing what you believe. We can always have a healthy toleration for each other’s differences. We can always still choose to love one another despite our misgivings.

Because at the end of the day, I think that that’s the most beautiful kind of love – the real one. It’s the kind of love that isn’t perfect. It’s the kind of love that is scarred, bruised, beaten up, and broken. But it’s also a love that keeps on fighting. It’s the kind of love that is not without its challenges; but is certainly not without its triumphs as well. The most beautiful love is the kind that endures struggles and differences.

The most beautiful love is the kind that isn’t easy – the kind that really forces us to take a deep look into the mirror and assess if we still like what we see. This kind of love is the one that demands so much from us but gives so much in return. The best kind of love isn’t the one that is without pain – because it’s through pain and suffering where we really learn to harden and strengthen ourselves.

And so I hope that you can love me. I hope that you can accept the fact that I’m going to hurt you sometimes. I hope you will be okay with me being mediocre in some aspects of life. I hope you will be fine with me disagreeing with you every so often. But you should know that if you love me, I am going to love you right back. And I am going to do whatever I can to protect that love.

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The Most Important Thing That I Look For In A Relationship Is Security

The single most important thing that I look for in relationships is simple: security. 

Because at the end of it all that’s all I ever really want to feel with someone: safe.

I just want to be able to feel like I can fully trust the person who I am with. I want to have the piece of mind that comes with being with a person who is always going to be authentic and sincere; real and genuine. I want to be in the kind of relationship where there is no room for fakeness or deceit. I don’t want to have to deal with being in a relationship with someone who forces me to scrutinize every single thing he says; someone who forces me to spot out inconsistencies in his alibis. I don’t want to have to be in a relationship where I find myself questioning everything that comes out of his mouth. I want to be in the kind of relationship where there is consistency in actions and in words. I want to be with someone who says one thing and follows it up with concrete actions. I just want to be with a person I can give my heart to with utmost confidence; someone who I know would never do anything to harm or betray me.

All I really want is to have the knowledge and confidence that a person is actually deliberately making the conscious choice to be with me on a daily basis. I don’t want to be in a relationship with someone who only uses me for the material pleasures that I can provide them. I don’t want to be in a relationship with someone who only wants to be with me for the novelty of it all. I don’t want to be in a relationship with someone who is only looking to attach their name to mine. I want a relationship that is based on real and raw love; the kind that only gets better over time. This is the kind of love that is unshakeable and unsullied by hidden motives and ill intentions. I want to be in a relationship with someone who I know will stay with me during the bad times and the good. I want someone who is going to choose to be at my side even when I’m being totally unreasonable; even when I’m letting my emotions get the best of me. I want someone to still be there for me when I wake up even though I lashed out at them the night before. I want to be with someone who accepts the fact that I am human and that I can have a few off days every once in a while. I want to be in a relationship with a person whose heart I don’t have to compete for anymore. I want someone who is going to give me all of their undivided attention; someone whose eyes I won’t have to worry about if they ever start to wander. I want someone who makes a dedicated choice to be with me after having seen all of who I am; after knowing where I stand in life. I want someone who needs to be with me just as much as I need to be with them. I want someone who makes me feel safe and secure as I lie in their arms.

Love, of course, is the foundation for any great and successful romantic relationship. But love is so dynamic. Love is always changing. Love is adapting. It is constantly evolving. Love is unpredictable and sometimes, it can bring a lot of instability. But when you’re in a relationship that makes you feel secure about your place in it, then not even the shakiest of circumstances will be enough to rattle you. Having a good love is great. But having a good love resting on a strong foundation of security is what I really want for myself and for my relationship. Because when security in a relationship comes crumbling down, not even love will be enough to save it from itself.

So yes, I still want someone who will be able to make my heart skip a beat. I still want to be with someone who can sweep me off my feet. I want someone who will make my days be filled with sunshine and rainbows; and my nights full of stars and comets. But more than anything else, I want to be with someone who will be able to kill off all of the insecurities that live and breed inside of me. I want to be with someone who prevents me from second-guessing myself and the relationship. I want someone who makes me feel sure and certain about where the relationship is going. I want someone who stays consistent even when everything around the world is changing so fast. I want someone who can give me security.